November 19, 2009

Giant Bullshit!

Friends,

Timmy Hairdo won the Cy Young.

Yeah, he did good. But he won it because:
1) Keith Law is fucking moron with longstanding issues against the Cardinals (seriously, look it up...him and that douche from Yahoo! sports named Jeff Passan have a serious boner for dissing the Cards (except for Pujols, but once they find a way, they will)...they do it probably because it gets them attention from people like me)
2) Will Carroll wanted to be special by being the only guy to vote for Dan Haren or Jair Jurrens or whatever the fuck to show he's the smartest guy in the pressbox. Well, you're special now, aren't ya, dipshit.

Oh, Timmy Hairdo is a good pitcher and you want to say something about how bad San Francisco's offense is, but you know, you have that Backfat Panda guy mashing the ball and the Cardinals' offense was shit all year, too. Pujols doesn't get to bat every inning now.

Jesus...that reminds me...MVP award? Will Pujols win? Keith Law won't be voting for him, that's for sure, because he doesn't play a "premier position" but will vote for Ryan Howard because he's "clutch." And Will Carroll will blow at least one vote on, fuck, I don't know, Fernando Tatis so he can feel special about being the only guy to vote for Fernando Tatis. Could they fuck that up and give the MVP to Hanley Ramirez? Well, actually that wouldn't be fucking up too bad because Hanley really is awesome, but still...they wouldn't dare not give the MVP to Pujols...would they?

viva mis birdos

1 comment:

Luke said...

I feel that the cardinals pitchers must have split the votes and Lincecum took the spoils. Since there were two cardinals pitchers, people probably had a hard time picking between them... because, like it or not, analysts root for teams, even if they ain't supposed to. I would say, though, in a dead heat, why not vote for the dude who never won it before?

They won't be able to screw pujols out of the mvp.