South Pasadena's Bullshit Publicity Stunt

Friends,

South Pasadena, California apparently has some kind of cussing ban. Read story here.

It was started by a No Cussing Club some high schooler began. Okay, we all know that this is a dumb, unconstitutional idea, but what I want to know is what is decided a cuss.

Surely the swear canon would be banned but what about gray area cuss words like retard or racial or sexual slurs. Would those be okay to say? What about foreign language cusses? What about euphemisms? What about the word suck, which some people view as offensive? Or boobs for that matter? How would you ever talk about your genitals....I mean, surely cock and dick would be banned but to some tallywhacker would be a swear while others would recoil at pecker? What about antiquated swears? What about crazy people who could be offended by the word couch? What about taking the lord's name in vain? What about when new swears are invented and used? But, if they compiled all the naughty language in a list, then wouldn't the list also need to be banned because of its naughtiness? What if they get a crazy, tyrannical mayor that bans all words with long E sounds?

What's even more interesting is that the people of the No Cussing Club are OBSESSED with cussing much more than the average joe, so since they are thinking about cussing all day long, doesn't that make them worse than the average cussing person who doesn't think about cussing all day?

Also interesting is that if this catches on, and South Pasadena somehow becomes a cuss-free zone, then I can only imagine that there will be schoolchildren, alone in their bedrooms, covers drawn over their heads, whispering "Fuck" silently like they were practicing black magic. Or rowdy teens will get together and have cuss parties, swearing to a point where all English syntax will break down around them. Talk about a way to empower words, eh?

And I wonder how this town will deal with Tourette's paitents or cable TV.

Oh well. Congratulations, South Pasadena, you're in the news. Well done. Too bad it couldn't have been for something interesting or useful, but hey, whateve. Hope your little real estate ad for social conservatives works out and you get a little boom going for your town. Good luck, assholes.

viva los dirty palabras