July 9, 2009

My Sentiments Exactly: Double Barrel Action

all right, scale. you deserved it the first time because you weighed me too much. but today, you weighed me 2.6 pounds less than yesterday, the day i recorded my weight loss for the month and in turn made me feel a little cruddy because i thought i had somehow gained 3 pounds that i thought i had really lost...and this magical 2.6 pound loss that it showed me today? that was after i ate breakfast and had yet to work out so if anything i should have been heavier than my actual weight with my belly full of rice krispies, coffee and toast...so did i lose more than 2.6 pounds in one day? no, i did not. it's just that this scale is a bastard. a vicious bastard designed by b.f. skinner to fuck with me and my mental state for some cruel psychological experiment.

so, scale, you rotten bastard, you get both barrels this time:

3 comments:

Emily said...

YES! I've said from the get-go that this scale is a bastard. Weighs me 3 pounds heavier on a regular basis. Jerk-weed scale.

Philly Baby said...

I can't tell, but it looks to me as if that little blue man on the scale is giving you both barrels right back. I say it's time for action--bust a cap in that plastic trickster.

GMACD said...

I think you should find the nearest river bank and let that scale weigh the bottom of it.